Saturday Evening and Sunday Morning...

Those of you who are at a loss as to what to do this weekend in KL, here are a few suggestions that are fun and make you feel good at the same time.

On Saturday May 31 night, head to One Utama for the Malaysian AIDS Council/Foundation's event to commemorate International AIDS Memorial Day. It starts from 7.30pm onwards and there'll be music and performances by people like Dina (1st runner-up of Malaysian Idol) as well as community groups. There'll also be information booths so you can find out more about HIV/AIDS.

On Sunday June 1 morning, if you can sacrifice your usual lie-in, take a walk from Dataran Merdeka to the National Press Club and show your support for media freedom. For information on the programme, please go to the Benar website here. If you're a journalist particularly, this would be a good way to spend your Sunday.

A Wedding

I went to a special event last night. Unfortunately I can't publish any photos or names because it was a confidential event. But last night I went to the wedding of two HIV-positive people, whom I'll call M (the groom) and J (the bride).

I've known M for a while. He's been HIV-positive for some time, acquired through the sharing of needles through drug use. He's been in and out of rehab centres several times, none of which helped. Eventually he found an NGO which suited him better and he cleaned up. Since then he's been working at various NGOs as an outreach worker, helping other drug users understand the dangers of HIV.

M has actually been one of the few HIV-positive Malaysians who has been on TV talking about what it's like to live with the virus. He is, like many drug users I have known, intelligent and articulate, able to talk with conviction about what it was like to be a drug user and then to find out that he's been infected. He can be emotional but is dignified always, never putting up with the pitying condescension that others sometimes inflict on those they deem 'less fortunate'.

I don't know J at all. All I know is that she became HIV-positive through her husband who left her with three children now aged 15, 13 and 8. From going to support groups for other HIV+ women, she started work as a peer counselor at PT Foundation and that's how she came to meet M.

Yesterday they had their akad at a masjid in Kampung Baru and then bersanding at PT Foundation's centre at Jalan Tuanku Abdul Rahman. It was very much a community wedding. The staff and members of PTF come from the community themselves, that is, they are almost all former drug users, sex workers, transgendered persons and single mothers. They worked together to have the first ever wedding at their place and it came out beautifully, with hantaran, a pelamin, two MCs who were as smooth and slick as any on TV, dancers welcoming the newlyweds, the whole works. Hubby and I were Guests-of-Honour ( my parents were originally invited but they are in Japan) so we had to lead the merenjis ceremony, followed by other guests and M's parents and older sister.

The most impressive thing for me was the fact that M's family was there. Both his parents, two of his sisters along with their spouses and children came to celebrate with them. I spoke with his Mum, who speaks perfect English along with his sisters who are both PhDs, one who works as a civil servant and one a lecturer. It's not the type of family you usually associate HIV+ people with ( and that's if you believe stereotypes) but it's clear that M comes from a highly-educated family.

M himself admitted that he never thought his family would be so supportive. It just goes to show, he said, that sometimes HIV+ people's fear of their own families is unwarranted. He said he did worry about telling his parents that he was marrying not just a woman who has three kids but also one who is HIV+. But before he could tell them, J had already told his mother about her status. His Mum simply asked him if it was true and when he said it was, she just nodded her agreement. I guess she knows that nobody knows more about what it means to be HIV+ than another one. I felt particularly touched when M's parents went up to merenjis because it really showed how much the union had their blessings.

The whole process of getting married is a tedious one for anyone. For HIV+ people it's worse. M and J come from different states. M firstly had to ask permission from his hometown to get married in KL. To do that, the authorities wanted proof of his previous divorce. Unfortunately it had been so long that he could neither remember the date nor produce any documents to show that he had indeed dissolved his previous marriage. It was only when his father stepped in that the authorities relented.

Then they had to submit to the mandatory HIV test. J comes from Selangor where it is required, as does Perak where M comes from. But both already know their status and were not hiding it from each other . (The purpose of the HIV test is supposedly so that nobody marries someone who's HIV-positive unknowingly). At first the religious authorities insisted that they had to still do the tests. Finally M got a letter from his doctor to confirm his HIV status and went to his hometown to submit it.

There, they insisted on counselling him. This is how it went:

"Bagaimana kamu dapat HIV?"

" Saya dijangkiti semasa saya berkongsi jarum sambil mengguna dadah."

"Aha! Saya dah teka, tentu itulah caranya kamu dapat!"

After that, M told the officer that he didn't want to be 'counselled' by him and that was that.

At the khenduri, I met another old HIV+ friend who introduced me to his wife and two kids. Like M, he had married an HIV+ woman with children, a pretty young woman who was pregnant. Apparently their doctor had told them their viral loads (the amount of the virus in their bodies) was undetectable because they are on antiretroviral medicines so it was pretty safe to try for a baby. Hopefully they have a good doctor taking care of them and they should be able to deliver a HIV-negative baby. (To ensure this, the baby should be delivered by ceasarian section and she must not breastfeed it afterwards).

I was happy I went because it was a happy event. And it gives you hope that at least for some HIV+ people, life can be pretty normal. Still, the fact that I cannot put their names here is an indication that the stigma and discrimination attached to AIDS hasn't waned. While M and J may not mind too much, I still have to think of their parents and families. The stigma of AIDS throws up a wider net of discrimination than we think.



The 25th International Candlelight AIDS Memorial Day was last Sunday May 18. But we don't need a special day to remember those who have gone too early from an easily preventable disease, and to show our support for those still living and their families.

And this is why they go on to have brilliant careers...

Thursday May 22, 2008

School Uniforms Sexy, Says Group

KUALA LUMPUR: A Malaysian group condemned the uniform worn by girls at government schools, saying it encouraged rape and pre-marital sex.

“The white blouse is too transparent for girls and it becomes a source of attraction,” National Islamic Students Association of Malaysia vice-president Munirah Bahari said in a statement.

“It becomes a distraction to men, who are drawn to it, whether or not they like looking at it,” she said, calling for a review of uniform policy so that it did not violate Islamic ideals.

In multicultural Malaysia, home to majority-Muslim Malays as well as ethnic Chinese and Indians, female students at government schools have a choice of wearing a white blouse with a knee-length skirt or pinafore.

They may also wear a “baju kurung” and a headscarf is optional for Malay students.

Munirah said that “covering up” according to Islamic precepts was important to fend off social ills, including “rape, sexual harassment and even premarital sex.”

“This leads to babies born out of wedlock and, to an extent, even prostitution,” she said.

“Decent clothes which are not revealing can prevent and protect women from any untoward situations,” she said, suggesting that girls wear a blouse of a different colour or with an undergarment.

However, the girls themselves also came in for criticism, with the association saying that some used the white blouse to lure men.

“This is the source of the problem, where we can see that schoolgirls themselves are capable of using this to attract men to them,” Munirah said.

“This could see them getting molested, having premarital sex and all sorts of things.” – AFP

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If we need more proof that our education system is producing intellectual midgets, this is it.

Of Bombs and Blogs

Folks, I know you all are dying for me to say something about Dad's latest bombshell. But as always I make it a point not to explain him to anyone since he does that pretty well himself. Just go to his blog and work it out for yourself.

I spent all afternoon yesterday with him and Mum at his office at Petronas. He had three TV interviews to do, two with Indonesian TV and one with CNBC. And received one visitor. The rest of the time we chatted while he looked over his blog posts. He writes them himself, then someone types them up, he reviews them and after he's satisfied with them, he gets them to post. As always with new bloggers, he is now soooo in love with blogging. I reminded him that I told him a year ago that it's very liberating. And he does read all the comments. (Even my ShaSha posted one yesterday to her Tok Det! I hope he managed to read it before he left the office.)

He's calm and as articulate as always so if anyone thinks he's gone wonky, he sure hasn't. His visitor will attest to that. He's gone off to Japan today to speak at the annual Nikkei conference.

So the situation is Dad, Mum and Mokhzani are out of UMNO for now and Mukhriz still in (but with gloves off). The rest of us don't count since we were never members in the first place.

I bumped into some old friends of his today and they said, "So much better to be free, you know...". Yep.

(Folks, I am stuck in a workshop for the next three days so advance apologies for lateness in posting comments.)

Melina and Friends Celebrate!

Some of you may remember Melina Jokita, the 15-year old girl from Timor Leste who had two holes in her heart repaired last year thanks to your generosity. Melina and the other children from Timor Leste are doing well in Melaka, getting better and going to school. They have also been joined by a few other children, also here for medical treatment and for schooling.

On May 24th, Timor Leste will celebrate the 6th anniversary of its independence and the children in Melaka will be making a presentation to remember and honour the sacrifices of the many individuals including fathers and mothers during the turmoil in their country especially most recently. The children will take the opportunity of this celebration to promote the native culture and tradition of their beloved country.

If you happen to be in Melaka on Saturday May 24, do drop by at the

C I J Primary School
Jalan Parameswara
Bandar Hilir
Melaka

from 5pm to celebrate with the children. The programme will be as follows:

The Theme of the Celebration is “ONE NIGHT IN TIMOR LESTE”.

5 pm – 6.30pm OPEN HOUSE, Finger Food provided
Movie and Slide Show re Timor Leste

6.30pm Timor Leste Anthem

6.40pm Speech by Maria Pereira on behalf of the Timor Leste’s youth

6.45 pm Speech by Timor Leste Ambassador for Malaysia Mr Juvencio Martins

and Presentation of letters of appreciation

7.15 pm Traditional Culture Performances

Meantime, one of the children Marciela Branco has started her own blog, http://timorlestenewgeneration.blogspot.com/, which tells the story of these orphans and how they were helped by Malaysians. Do take a look. Marciela learnt to do this all by herself, something she could never have dreamed of back in Dili.

Barcelona Bon-Bons

Hi folks, sorry for the long silence but I needed the break. There is nothing quite like travel to a totally different place to soothe over grief so my trip to Barcelona helped a lot.

I went to Barcelona to attend the 19th International Harm Reduction Conference where I had been invited to speak at a plenary session. This is an annual conference which discusses the harms related particularly to drug use such as HIV/AIDS, TB, Hepatitis and other diseases. About 1300 people attended the conference including a tiny delegation of Malaysians comprising myself, two colleagues from UM and UKM and three people from our Prisons' department. The Prisons officers had come to present a paper on the recently-begun programme to provide methadone-substitution therapy in our prisons to drug-using prisoners. I missed their session but I have to say that, as is sadly typical for some of our government people, the enthusiasm to learn anything new from others was minimal. My colleague from UM had pleaded with the conference organisers for a place on a visit to a Spanish prison for one of our Prisons' people which they finally agreed to as long as she could also arrange an interpreter for him. After much trouble she did, but despite all this, the Prisons' officer turned up late for the bus and missed the visit altogether.

Later on, an attempt to get them to meet with the Iranian delegation who have done great work with prisoners using drugs was brushed off in favour of a visit to the Barcelona football stadium instead. I wonder what report they will give back home on their attendance at the conference, if at all. The head of the delegation was funded by the UN but the other two was funded by our Prisons Department (ie with taxpayers' money) and after Barcelona, they were off to Paris. Doubt if they were visiting Parisian prisons.

To be fair, Barcelona is a hard place to have a conference in. It's a beautiful city and as luck would have it, despite forecasts for bad weather, in fact we had beautiful weather, cool and sunny which made it difficult to stay indoors. It's got many attractions from palaces, churches,museums to great food to good shopping. The vibe is cool and creative which is not surprising given that this is the hometown of Picasso, Miro and the incomparably eccentric Gaudi.

It says a lot for Barcelonans that they nurtured geniuses like Picasso and tolerated and supported nutty architects like Gaudi. A visit to the Picasso Musuem which showcases the artist's early works ( some from age 8) confirms that this was a man born to paint. Looking at his evolution from the conventional portraits that he painted at the age of 15 to his later abstracts, you get to understand better why he painted the way he did and how the political landscape shaped him. And the Spaniards actually celebrate artists like these. I was in Spain in the '80s when his masterpiece about the Spanish Civil War, 'Guernica' was returned to Spain. It made the headlines. At Madrid airport, Customs officers insisted on opening the canvas to make sure it was the real Guernica that was returning to its homeland and not a fake.

Inside of the Sagrada Familia.

Gaudi is another cattle of fish altogether. His buildings look completely crazy but all of them are architecturally sound with many innovations. His Sagrada Familia church is still being built and won't be done until 2026, the 100th anniversary of Gaudi's death. It is an Alice-in-Wonderland building filled with symbols taken not just from Christian religious history but also nature, with flowers, fruits and animals sculptured onto the walls and towers. The inside of the church is glorious high-ceilinged space that looks as if you're in a jungle of tall flowers.

My favourite was the Casa Battlo which was a residence that Gaudi designed for a wealthy family. It is as quirky as any home could possibly be. Door frames and staircase handles are curved wood, walls and floors are curved and flowy and chimneys are mad splashes of colour. Yet everything works and makes sense in terms of letting in light and air. Still, you have to wonder about the conversations Gaudi must have had with his clients when they must have wondered if he was completely off his rocker.

Rooftop of Casa Batllo.

Casa Batllo chimneys.

As a city, Barcelona strikes me as very livable. People are friendly and despite warnings about pickpockets, I didn't feel unsafe. (Mind you, one of our Prisons guys got pickpocketed on the metro). Public transport is very good with buses plying the wide boulevards very often. A new environmental-friendly initiative by the city is Bicing. Under this system, you can buy a prepaid card (1 Euro a week or 24 Euro a year) which you use to rent a bicycle from the city to cycle everywhere. At your destination there is a place to park and lock your bike and your card ensures that it is always you using the bike. It's still an experimental system but you see many people riding the white and red Bicing bikes everywhere and the traffic jams are never as bad as any of ours. Barcelona has a great website that explains its sustainable transport policies as well as everything else happening in the city. By the way, at pedestrian crossings, a reminder painted on the road reminds you that most accidents in Barcelona involve pedestrians crossing roads without looking. It sure makes you check for cars before you step out.

I'm convinced a First World city (or any city) of the best kind is the type that gives equal access to all of its citizens. At the Fondation Joan Miro museum, I saw teachers taking groups of little kids and explaining Miro's art to them to enthusiastic response. Even more astoundingly I saw a guide take a blind man around the exhibits. He wore white gloves and was encouraged to touch Miro's sculptures while the guide explained the art.

Barcelona is in the Catalunya region of Spain and the people proudly call themselves Catalunyan and speak Catalan. Catalan is their first language, it is taught in schools alongside Spanish (Castillian) which is the national language and all signs are in Catalan first. It's a bit like going to Kelantan and having all signs in Kelantanese first, followed by Bahasa Malaysia. For those expecting to practice their Spanish in Barcelona (like my hubby), it can be a bit of a shock because Catalan is quite different. Having said that, people are very welcoming when you do try to speak Spanish and nowhere near as snooty as the French when you stumble and stammer.

As for food, I only have one recommendation to make: just go to the Mercat de la Boqueria (Boqueria market) at La Rambla and have the seafood. It's fresh, varied and just out-of-this-world delicious.

Hope you enjoyed this little travelogue. I will get back into things Malaysian once I've caught up with everything.

An Inky Situation

One of my regular commenters and blogger, Donplaypuks, asked me to blog about this issue but I haven't been reading the papers much lately for obvious reasons. So I thought I'd just post his comment here and see if anyone will pick it up:

The MPs are not asking the obvious question in Parliament, i.e.

(1) did the EC & its famous Chief actually place an order with the Indian Govt for 48,000 bottles at RM2.4 million or for any other qty of Ink from any other country?

(2) Was the Ink delivered before 8th March to M’sia or was there a delay/screw up?

(3) If the EC Chief answers that the Ink was delivered on time, can we get the Auditor General to issue a certificate of verification & confirmation.

I have a sneaking suspicion that the red-herring about ink smugglers was hatched to cover up either an administrative screw-up or right from day 1, they have been lying to the Public.

I sometimes think even our new MPs have the IQ of a mosquito in that they seem incapable of making a concerted effort to get to the bottom of an important matter.

Thanks DPP.

I am off to attend a conference in Spain tonight and may only have intermittent access to internet. So apologies in advance if your comments get posted late.